ELECTION SPECIAL EDITION: A Presidential Statement

What if I proclaim I'm still president?

Tweet an executive order:

I, hearby, overrule the election.

I, after all, built THE WALL on the border.

(Shudda done Canada too.

All of those beavers and wolveses and mooses.

And, too, the Carib-boo.  

Or is that Halloween hullabaloo —

Haitian-Canadians who do voodoo?)

Miller and Barr say I've got the power.

I don't need to get re-elected.

Adding my votes from 2016 —

when Biden got zero — I was selected

to serve — and cavort — for four more years

until Covid makes Dems disappear.

Rudy agrees, though FOX distorts.

Still and all, I own the courts.

I smell a plot. A commie tsunami.

I am afraid. I want my mommy,

who was good lookin' and daddy was rich.

I am so screwed. Son. Of. A. Bitch!